I was reading Promise Tangeman’s blog tonight and I came across an entry titled, “When You are Feeling Discouraged.” This post struck a chord with me and really hit home. I have been a social worker for the past 22-years and photographer since I was 10 years-old. I chose social work because I never thought I could make a living as a photographer.
Over the past 22-years as a social worker I have seen my chosen profession go through quite a few changes. Some of those changes have been good and some of them have made me sit up and ask “What the Hell?” I think what raises my eyebrows in question more than anything are the agency’s who have either not responded to the changes or respond so reactively as to again force the question, “What the Hell?”
Last year I was the recipient of a request, an opportunity to photograph a wedding. I tried several different ways to not shoot this wedding and at one point just simply said, “No!” I had never photographed anything other than landscapes and family pictures. There was a part of me that wanted to photograph this wedding but a bigger part of me that didn’t think I could do the job. I provided the bride and groom with the names of several local photographers whose work I greatly admired. The couple came back and said, “Their work is nice but we really want you to photograph our wedding.” I had no portfolio to speak of. I finally gave in and said, “Yes.” Little did I know a new career was knocking at the door. I answered the door, looked this career directly in the eye and never looked back. I had more fun photographing this wedding than I have had in the last 15-years working as a social worker. The couple loved the photos and I felt more energized than I had in a long time.
There is not a day that goes by that I don’t spend at least 2-hours working to improve and grow my photography business. I didn’t expect my business to grow overnight and I am thankful it is growing slowly giving me the time I need to grow and improve my skills. Unfortunately as I continue to work as a social worker, I find my energy levels draining. I no longer find the personal and professional satisfaction I once knew earlier in my social worker career. Yet when I take my camera in my hand I find my stress literally melting away. I also notice my vision, the way I see things changing. I begin to see things I was once too busy to see. I see the possibilities where others see none.
The next few paragraphs in italics are borrowed from Promise’s blog.
“As you can relate.. I’m sure…. the road of an artist goes up and down. There are times that I am riding on cloud nine with excitement about my future and times in my heart that I am so low in confidence and motivation. My heart deeply burns inside for something more. Today is one of those dark days… where my flesh gets the better of me. My sweet husband reminded me of these verses this morning in prayer.
(Psalm 37:3 )
-Trust in the LORD and do good; dwell in the land and enjoy safe pasture.
-Delight yourself in the LORD and he will give you the desires of your heart.
-Commit your way to the LORD; trust in him and he will do this
-He will make your righteousness shine like the dawn, the justice of your cause like the noonday sun.
-Be still before the LORD and wait patiently for him; do not fret when men succeed in their ways, when they carry out their wicked schemes.
-Refrain from anger and turn from wrath; do not fret–it leads only to evil.
There is nothing more comforting and reassuring to know that God is in control and that he never stops doing a work in us. I am so thankful today where God has lead me. And I am so thankful that there is hope and power beyond ourselves.
This is a Photograph I want to share with you today. I made this photograph a few years ago. Its a simple concept, a reminder to be a light in a dark world. The world is full of competition, selfishness, pride, greed, and other dark elements that can bring us down.
The photograph above represents for me the world and all of it’s possibilities. As I sat and watched the gulls that day, I thought of the soundtrack by Neil Diamond for the movie Jonathan Livingston Seagull. This is the story of a seagull who strived to fly farther even though he was told by those around him he could not. I recall this movie’s release in 1973. I purchased the album and listened to it non-stop. I still listen to this soundtrack as it has become a soundtrack for my life. When I hear a song like “Be“, I often well up with tears and emotions swim through my head like the graceful winds on which Jonathan flew. In short the story of Jonathan seeking flight is a metaphor for what should be our true nature in life; that of seeking a higher purpose.
Watch the video for the song “Be” and let me know if you don’t agree.
Through God and not ourselves, God can use and strengthen even the smallest of us. He can use us beyond our own ability to outshine the darkness. I am reminded today to continue to be faithful in the Lord and faithful in my work.
For me my faith in God has helped me through those down times. I found Promise’s blog to be inspirational and it definitely helped me get over a period of discouragement.
As always, thanks for reading. I hope you enjoy and please, keep coming back.
